So today,
My class teacher gave me (and my friends ofc) a homework. she told me (or us) to write about me, myself, and I on a "magic paper" (she called it like that) and it must be full!! tbh Im so lazy to write.... because... I like typing better.
I may be going to write a little there and tell her to read this blog...
Make sure you will read this, ms! :)
Monday.
tomorrow is monday.
I have to go to school.
but now, I'm scared to go.
something happened in the past.
it's something you can't erase.
I am excited too. because when you go to school it means that you're not with your parents and for me it's a good thing.
But, school makes me scared. makes me cry. makes me nervous.
I don't know how to deal with this anymore because it's too confusing.
When I think of school, all I think are stressful, not fun, scary, and any other negative thinks. And after I think of that, I would start to cry.
I'm actually happy for going back to school but at the same time I'm afraid.
I don't know how people could help me about this.
I want to talk to a counsellor or a phycologist but I don't know if I could because I don't open myself to other people..
I could only write on my blog, hoping someone read my blog, and hoping someone help me.
Hi guys!
Another thing happened in my life. Like seriously, if I don't know A Pink, Shinee, Exo, or others I may be have gone now. I basically hate my life. Because there's something. Something's not good. Really really bad.
Back again!
I just watched JeKrys' last week episode and there's a music video making scene that reminds me of my childhood. I've actually been on a music video which means I've experienced like what Krystal did on the episode. So, I'm thinking of sharing my experiences there...
Like what Krystal said, shooting a music video is so damnly tiring. You shoot it from dawn until the sun goes down again. You have to do your make-up first (of course its done by the make up artist) and keeping it for hours (I mean, you can't ruin your make up, right?), You have to wait for your return to be shoot, you have to repeat your shoot if it doesn't turn good, etc.
You know, if you have to repeat your shoot means you listen the songs in repeat too. That's why the singer will be get bored of your own songs. That's why when Krystal turn on SNSD's Mr. Mr. Jessica is like "하지마~~~~~~" the same with Krystal.
Of course I'm only an extra but the experience is kinda exciting because it's my 1st time. And that was like when I was still in primary school. I could be an extra because my dad is the producer of the song so he just let me be an extra there.
I think I couldn't tell you on which music video I'm in because it would be so damn embarrassing... hehehe I'm so sorry...
Thank you for reading my story...
I hope you guys could experience it soon! :)
xx.
-k-
"Brothers are people whom we can go through hardships together and help each other." -Lay
He left. We have to accept that. And we have to support him. We have to support both sides.
Anyway....
I know what it feels like. It's like you have to break your friendship. And I know that's hurt. Life is not easy as you think it is. Life is hard. That's why there are a lot of people who committed suicide.
People who can endure the hardness of this life are the best people. Like seriously, I'm a person who could not endure the hardness. I prove it once. I failed once. I've hit the bottom.
When I failed to endure it, I feel like I'm a loser. I just want to die. I wrote it on my diary "Why am I alive? and why I can't do anything?" I've quit school for like... 3 or 4 months, I think? I quit because I can't endure the hardness.
I'm not like kpop idols who could endure the hardness of training, seniority, being mocked, etc.
Yes, I'm a loser. But I don't want this to happen again with you guys. So, don't be a loser like me. Just don't. ☺
-K-
hiii I'm going to talk about me! yeay for you who doesnt know me ^^
first, I think I'm kinda introvert (a little). I'm kinda scared to meet or talk to new people. I always want to try but ended up not trying because I'm too scared. but, I love being on the stage. I've been doing some performances (eventhough it's only a mini performance) such as dancing. I love (literally obsessed with) glee (was) maybe not now (again) because the story now are kinda boring and doesn't match up which I think they're so random now... but still... I love their songs. ^^
for now, im kinda obsessed with kpop. from 2010/2011 I think... no one knows at that year. hahaha because I keep it secret (hm, guilty pleasure I think?) until I have bestfriends that like it too so I reveal it little by little from last year...
my fav group? hm... first its khj (an alien. HAHA NO) then.. 2pm & miss A. and SHINee then A Pink, CN Blue, WINNER, and EXO. but my ultimate group is A Pink. (you can call me a panda then. bcs whenever people are talking about panda/apink im going to look at the people, LOL) if you ask me which one is my bias.. then I cannot. they (each person) are just different.
I think that's enough about me. I just want to share my story about me ^^
catch me on twitter: @kaykirana (fanacc) and @kiranakay (personal acc) ♡
-k-
